My body has spoken loud and clear, it is time to back off and not push so hard. We were gifted with 588 Milkweed plants to support the Monarch butterflies and I wanted to help plant them before the rains came. I did quite a bit but the next day I couldn’t go another step and gave in to quitting, allowing others to keep on planting. I really want to push past my aging body and keep on doing what I have always done. That night I returned home and awoke with another prolonged episode of A-Fib.
It is not easy to accept that I cannot do what I have always done before. I still carry such a deep connection to the land and all of Nature at TLC, and I want to be there. Problem is that when I show up, my mind immediately runs around the entire farm scanning all that needs attention, improvements and repairs. I carry this deeply held sense of responsibility and the notion that I need to be the one to get things done. That can no longer be the case. While I will always be around TLC, I must heed the clear messages to let go of any stress. I feel some sadness about that, kind of like letting go of a whole stage of my life, and I am learning.
Let’s widen the lens a bit, because the body of Mother Earth is also crying out with loud messages to us all. It is time to change our way of being in every aspect of life. Life will never be the same again and it is up to us to adjust. For Americans, that means letting go of many of our expectations about how we have always done things. Too warm? Too cold, just crank up the thermostat to get “climate control.” While others fear for their very existence, we are concerned with how fast our internet is. The contrasts now are glaring as the pandemic shines a spotlight on the disparities in how people live worldwide. When I take a peek into the refugee camps or cyclone-torn Bangladesh, I can’t help but feel a deep sadness. Being shut down by a pandemic allows us all the opportunity to take stock of our way of living and to come out of our denial about how rapidly our planet is changing. We find ourselves at the end of an era and it is time to learn to let go of much that we have taken for granted, so that others may live.
One crucial aspect of this entire experience, is to take time to feel the sadness being triggered by so very many experiences all around. It fills the collective unconscious all around me, like an ocean of sorrow. If I do not feel the grief, it is because I am not paying attention or am distracting from it. When I dare to open my heart wide, there is a ton of grief to release. That is a necessary step in order to stay clear enough to allow the Love to flow through. Ours is a grief-denying culture. Indigenous cultures have much healthier ways of clearing out sorrow within the support of a loving community. I need that now; perhaps you do too. Grief is not bad, it is a normal response to loss. Simply stated, it is energy that needs to move. The only way it can cause harm is if it remains stuck in the heart center.
It is time now to learn let go, in order to stand up to the amazing work we have come here to do with an open heart.